Thursday, June 27, 2013
The Weight Is Over.
Call the Coast Guard. I bought a momkini.
The birdie is teething, which has resulted in her insistence that I snuggle her in the guest bedroom at least three nights a week. I keep telling her it's too hot to spoon and that it's sort of gross how our muffin tops touch and then start co-sweating, but she doesn't care.
Last week I was lying with her, listening to her breathing slow when my mind wandered off to when I was pregnant with each of my babies and how hard it was to sleep. I couldn't flip over, I couldn't reach the covers I had kicked off in the night, and I was in a constant state of fear that I would smother my husband in his sleep like that cartoon of the fat lady with her missing chihuahua stuck to her butt.
I started counting. Including my two pregnancies and a miscarriage before the duckling (no really, it's okay), I had been pregnant for 94 out of 169 weeks between April 2009 and July 2012. And I wasn't Kate Middleton pregnant. I was National Zoo pregnant. During both pregnancies I eventually outweighed my husband. It was difficult on both of us.
But it's been nearly a year since the birdie was born. And as I lie there next to my sleeping, teething, sweaty-headed infant, I realized that I no longer felt I could or needed to describe myself as "post-baby".
I am (almost) back to (a new) normal. And to celebrate, I bought a muffin-top & mom-boob friendly bathing suit I'm calling my momkini. Now all I need is one of those visors moms wear under their bangs.